Wretched excess and college football myths

By Jeff Orvis

The Ford Motor Company seems to like the letter “E.” Its line of SUVs include the Escape, the Explorer and the Expedition. All seem like fine vehicles. I sometimes wondered if they could make something even bigger. Maybe they could call it the Wretched Excess. It would take premium gas, get about a dozen miles to the gallon and have a base price of over $50,000.

The Excess came to mind in recent weeks as I watched the thousands of folks all across this country (and some other places as well) occupying downtown locations. The Occupy Wall Street group, which was recently washed out of its campground, was protesting what they claimed to be the excessive salaries paid to some bankers and other Wall Street folks. In an era where many of us have been forced out of our profession, they are wondering why the corporate leaders keep on cashing those seven-figure annual paychecks.

I've written before on how corporate America is giving us less for our money, especially in the grocery store. Even more evident are the companies that continue to move manufacturing jobs to other countries and other practices in an effort to increase the almighty bottom line and look good for the stockholders.

Many folks questioned why banks tried to increase various fees while the CEOs of the national banks made obscene salaries and bonuses. But I've had a more basic question when it comes to banks: Why is the bank building the most prominent, massive and architecturally significant building in virtually every town in America?

Think about it. Travel to any town across the country, whether it is a major city or a small town with a two-block Main Street. If the city has a bank, it won't be hard to pick out of the other businesses in town. Soaring two or three story entries, heavy front doors coated in bronze or brass and hundreds of square feet of marble are often the norm, rather than the exception. When was the last time a plush bank lobby helped you get better interest on your savings account or helped you get a home or business loan?

I realize that this building design trend is nothing new. I suspect that many banks in the Old West were the only buildings in town with brass accents on the teller cages and inlaid tile floors. I suppose the idea of fancy buildings for banks came from the notion that customers would trust their money to someone who could afford a fancy place to house it. It probably was supposed to promote customer confidence.

But in an era where banks are trying to hit us with higher ATM fees or service charges for accounts that fall below a certain level, do they really need to continue to choose splendor over function? Just wondering...

It was just about this time of the year. Our second grade class was eating lunch one day at Riverdale School. We were starting to get excited about Christmas and the accompanying school vacation. Our teacher, Miss Good, sensed our excitement and realized that many of us had younger siblings. In a matter-of-fact tone, she told us that while she realized that we knew that Santa would not be coming down our chimneys, we should keep the “truth” to ourselves so we wouldn't ruin it for our younger brothers and sisters.

I remember chills ran down my spine that day. I knew this day was coming, when I would have to admit to myself that the legend of the Jolly Old Soul was probably impossible. But my fear was if I admitted it out loud, I wouldn't get any presents! I did a good job of keeping this quiet in my family until the sixth grade, when my sister and I admitted to our parents we realized who was responsible for nice Christmas presents.

Fast forward about 50 years and I had that same chill when news came out of State College, PA, about the scandal involving the Penn State football coaching staff members. I was never a real fan of Penn State football, especially when the Nittany Lions joined the Big Ten. But I certainly admired what they stood for – a tough-as-nails team that gave everything they had on every play. They played tough, but by the rules. Their coach, Joe Paterno, virtually owned the program, having been associated with it for over 60 years. He and his wife recognized that while football was vital to his career, Penn State was more than its football program. To that end, they have returned over $4 million in personal donations to the university over the years.

All that was instantly forgotten with the news of a 40-count indictment of a former longtime assistant coach on the staff. Sixty-one years of devotion to a program was destroyed with one document.

In my mind's eye, I see a sorry parade of Santa, the Easter Bunny and the Tooth Fairy marching down the road, fading into the distance, suddenly joined by the most veteran of college football coaches. Myths one and all.